An Approach to Understanding Emotional Health (Part 3)

Summarized by Verne Kallejian, PhD
August 16, 2006

In this article, Dr Verne Kallejian reviews the concept of emotional set points, and how knowledge of them can help us improve our emotional well-being. Robert Griffith, Editor.

Introduction

Living in New Mexico, we are constantly aware of the Navajo religion and philosophy that requires one to be in harmony with nature. By 'nature' I include the weather, friends, tribe, clan and family, health, happiness, and self-esteem.

The Navajo have a number of rituals that help to make this harmony happen. There are family activities, the hiring of a shaman to do a "sing", and sand painting, to name a few. A shaman is a member of a tribal society who acts as a medium between the visible world and the invisible spirit world. If a Navajo doesn't feel well, he may go to the local Indian Hospital for treatment. He may also engage a shaman to help him get in better harmony with nature. Of course, the shaman gets all the credit for the cure.

Unfortunately, we have neither the philosophy nor the rituals in western civilization to facilitate emotional health in the aging process. Very few life experiences prepare us to deal with the potential problems of aging. Nothing can easily replace the self-esteem of an important job or easily replace the friendships that are terminated by illness, death, moving to a new environment or other unexpected events.

How Do You Know When You Are 'In Harmony'?

Current theory proposes that everyone has a 'set point' around which they tend to make their adjustments. This theory proposes that everyone has a set of conditions which he recognizes as a goal to experience well-being. These set points may shift from time to time and are the result of a lifetime of experiences. For example, one person may have a set point that does not include happiness or self-esteem. Another may have a set point that includes a clear image of identity, self-esteem, and evidence of growth in spite of adversity. For some people, to be free of pain brings about a state of well being.

Of course, set points can change over time. It's the purpose of this brief article to suggest that you should regularly evaluate your set point in order to determine whether you should change it or return to a previously satisfactory set point; this is especially necessary if you have had a change in your living environment.

During the course of a lifetime each person acquires one or even many set points; however, we rarely fully evaluate them in depth at that particular time in our life. We are on a kind of treadmill, permitting our set points to drift according to our most recent experiences. This process is called the adaptive theory of well-being.

It should no longer come as a surprise that people living in what we may call negative circumstances report well-being scores that are well above average. This well documented fact should not be used as evidence that people inevitably adapt. The reported feelings of well being may just be due to what another person might consider as low expectations. For some people, having enough food, shelter and freedom from pain is enough; feelings of happiness or self-esteem are not part of their equation.

Changing Set-Points and What to Do

One way to chart a new path is to increase feelings of happiness. Engaging in different activities can sometimes stop the treadmill of adaptive well being. One researcher found that when people practiced several random acts of kindness on one day each week, happiness improved. This happiness lasted for several months after they stopped the intentional daily acts of kindness. Because it's assumed that happiness cannot be changed, there's been very little vigorous research on this topic. However, one study included group interaction on the Internet, i.e. 'talking' to others and revealing oneself to strangers. These personal experiences were productive for the person and helped to elevate their set point.

New Experiences

New experiences of almost any kind are amazingly productive in altering mood set points; recognition of skills and abilities that may not have been in one's awareness surface. A new experience need not be dramatic. I have found that people who engage in conversations with strangers walk away feeling better. Some people take a trip to a new country or different area in which they live. Others go to school and learn a new subject or skill.

The most important change that one can make is to develop a support group where one feels safe and able to talk. The results of this kind of effort can be profound. Schools and communities have ongoing support groups that one can join. The Internet has endless possibilities. The experience of even beginning to make the effort is worth a great deal in itself. If you are not accustomed to talking about yourself, just starting to do so can have an amazing effect. For example, someone could start a Sunday breakfast meeting and invite new people until she has a support group that works. Breakfast may even go on for most of the day with worthwhile communication!

Older adults are now the fastest growing segment of the US population. In 2011 the first group of baby boomers will turn 65 and by 2030 nearly 20% of the population is expected to be over 65. Congress is working to revitalize one of the most important pieces of federal aging legislation, the Older Americans Act (OAA). Originally signed into law in 1965, this act provided for the coordination and support for community based programs for older adults and their families.

Summary

Here are some suggestions to assist you in your emotional health and aging.

1. Evaluate the psychological set point in your makeup. At what set point are you satisfied with your emotional health? Write it down so you can go back regularly to review and evaluate it.
2. Try out some new experiences.
3. Learn to talk about your conflicts, dilemmas and strivings.
4. Find some people with whom you will be comfortable. Start with a few people and let your group grow.
5. Go to community programs where you can meet new people and engage in new experiences.
6. Ask other people what they have tried and find out what worked for them.

Finally, look back through your life and try to remember periods when you were happy. What were the conditions? Can any of them be duplicated? What are you willing to do to elevate your self esteem and happiness? Then plan a path to develop a new set point that you feel is worthwhile.

You can reach Dr Kallejian directly at: vernekallejian@cybermesa.com

Source

• Beyond the Hedonic Treadmill: Revising the Adaptation Theory of Well-Being. E. Diener, RE. Lucas, CN. Scollon, American Psychologist, 2006, vol. 61, pp. 305--314

Related Links
An Approach to Understanding Emotional Health (Part 1);
An Approach to Understanding Emotional Health (Part 2);
Healthy Relationships

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