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 What If? Prepare By Talking About Plans Today
Discussions about what kinds of treatment you want at the end of life
are likely to be most useful if you plan long before decisions have
to be made. You might call this "what if?" planning.
What if I should become too sick to eat except through a tube?
What if my doctors say I will have only a short time to live?
What if I can't talk or write or signal my thoughts? Who do
I trust to make important treatment decisions for me? This what
if? planning, though uncomfortable at first, will help you feel
more in control. It also can be a very special gift to family and
loved ones, who can be spared the burden of making choices without
knowing what is most important to you.
Many of the choices you will make about the end of life will involve
medical treatments. But these decisions are not likely to be the
most important ones. Your ideas and hopes about the end of your
life - being with your family, or making peace with God, for example
- are the more meaningful ones. Your values and beliefs should guide
medical choices whenever possible - not the other way around.
One way to approach these kinds of choices is to consider the questions
on a values history questionnaire. These are not questions
that you may have seen on a living will. Your answers will not be
simple "yes's" or "no's." While this questionnaire
may look complicated, it can help you to talk about your wishes
with someone who may have to make decisions for you when you cannot.
Filling out a questionnaire like this will help you think about
how you hope things will be. Your answers will also be a useful
way to get started talking with your family.
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